“Remember that press releases are written by the companies, not by a reporter, so they can be full of company bias. Often, as you search online news databases, it may be difficult to distinguish between a press release and a news story written by a journalist. The best way to distinguish the two is by looking closely at the first couple words of the story, which is where the source of the story is usually identified. If the source is identified as “BusinessWire” or “PR Newswire” then it is a press release issued by a company.”

So according to proper Press Release format, this isn’t even accurately constructed.

And personally (not that anyone is asking), I think this is pretty disgusting. A Press Release? Really?

Well, the biggest issue I have with this remains the phrase “Kaia has been placed on the national missing persons NCIC etc”.

1) The National Missing Persons NCIC does not exist. It’s never existed. The NCIC’s purpose is (from their website):

“The purpose for maintaining the NCIC system is to provide a computerized database for ready access by a criminal justice agency making an inquiry and for prompt disclosure of information in the system from other criminal justice agencies about crimes and criminals. This information assists authorized agencies in criminal justice and related law enforcement objectives, such as apprehending fugitives, locating missing persons, locating and returning stolen property, as well as in the protection of the law enforcement officers encountering the individuals described in the system.”

That being said, sure you can say “but it says locating missing persons”. Yes. It helps law enforcement agencies and other criminal justice agencies by being an information database. None of the people this “release” is being targeted at (all bt’s fans and slobbering sycophants) are law enforcement officers who can do anything with the NCIC.

The public cannot access the NCIC, nor can they commit information to the NCIC. Contacting them is a bit like calling up Domino’s and looking for a furnace cleaning. Just doesn’t work.

He might have meant to have the name of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children invoked (http://www.missingkids.com), and has claimed that this particular organization is now involved, however as of this writing, she isn’t listed as missing on their site either.

That out of the way, lets look at it some more. Nowhere is his NAME used, it’s all “BT this” “multi platinum that”. Who *gives* a fuck what he’s done. That has no bearing on the situation, it’s just a useless attentionwhore..

Then there is the overall tone of the article.. It looks like it was banged together by a few monkeys on typewriters.. A quick visit to the PR firms website leads into, well, a clusterfuck of poor flash design and an unreadable portfolio.. So Maybe they don’t really know what they’re doing, and this is just an example of their fine work.

And then, lets have a peek at the quote from Mr. BT (of course, not Brian, or Mr. Transeau, but BT) himself:

I am diligently and delicately working to do everything possible to amend this tragic family situation.  As a father my only goal is to get my daughter back home in a stable and safe environment.  I appreciate your continued support and understanding in this desperate hour.

Ok.. So you’re diligently doing everything possible to get your daughter back when, in between the gigs you’re still playing? When you’re not yelling at a bunch of people on the internet? Calling them names and making false accusations?

And “as a father, my only goal etc..”

1) That’s YOUR implication, that Kaia is unsafe.  As you say, you’ve not spoken to her or ashley since this all went down, how do you know she’s not in a safe environment, and very happy to be with her Mother, hm?

2) I notice you’re no longer implying Ashley hit Kaia, which must mean it was hyperbole used to elicit sympathy. Good job, sir!

And, then we close out with a link to his MySpace! Because knowing more about Brian, sorry, BT, will of course help us all telepathically find his daughter and save the day!

Or, wait, it’ll drive his hitcount up and get him more publicity!

And then, at the bottom, what do we have, not the proper authority contact number restated (as it gets lost in the original nonsense paragraph), but the contact of his PR guy. What can he do? Sweet fuck all! Maybe write another press release!

And really, speaking of the press release. Why, weeks later, is this being handled “properly”? Lynne’s goofy little poster was a huge joke, and obviously they’ve realized that by hiring a “professional”, but they still look like gigantic fuckoffs.

This whole situation is a bloated, ginormous clusterfuck, and the only person to blame for it is Brian. This has been handled so terrible from moment 1. Why would you involve a squadron of asskissers in a criminal matter?  He should have kept his mouth shut, and dealt with ONLY the authorities.

Even the gear theft posts are foolish, because all you’re doing is letting the thieves know what to hide and what they can sell.  Quite frankly, every time a major event has “broken” with BT, it’s done nothing but make him look like a chump, or, to quote “The King of Kong”, one of 2007’s better films, it’s Chumpatized him.

The argument from the other camp seems to be that BT’s private life is no ones business. Why didn’t they stick to this line of thought on their own?

You’ve got a whole pile of shit on your face, kids. Oatmeal, some gruel, and some dung.

I mean, really. Fuck off, I’m Clive Owen. That’s Mental.

(PS Vote BT’s Hair in ‘08!)

couldnt the defendant use this in the court?  and the other poster…

Authorities should of been the only ones to know about this… period

that’s why they could use this to establish his manipulative nature perhaps.  any lawyers here? lol